simple.

things i promise (no one BUT) myself to do. every day:

1. drink at LEASt two large glasses of water, if not more
2. do at least 40 sit ups
3. do at least 10 push ups
4. write. something
5. organize something
6. floss
7. laugh
8. choose kindness instead of criticism
9. hug like i mean it
10. take 5 deep cleansing breaths

SILENCE

MY MIND AND HEART ARE ENGAGED IN A WAR

SORTING THROUGH BULLSHIT MINUTIA LIKE
BOOKING
APPOINTMENTS TO HAVE A 285 DOLLAR FILLING
PUT IN A TOOTH THAT WILL FALL OUT IN 4 YEARS
AND
DESPERATION, SHAME AND PANIC
OVER THE ELECTION OF REPUBLICAN
SCOTT BROWN
TO THE UNITED STATES SENATE

THERE ARE LAUNDRY AND BILLS PILING UP EQUALLY
INSERTING STRESS INTO THE AIR
AND THERE IS HAITI GETTING HIT; AGAIN TODAY
RUNNING INTO THE STREETS, ASHY WITH FEAR

THERE IS A CAR IN THE DRIVEWAY
IN NEED OF MAJOR WORK OR REPLACEMENT
THAT IS SIMPLY UNAFFORDABLE
AND A FRAGMENTED POLITICAL SYSTEM
DIVIDING FRIENDS AND NEIGHBORS
CAUSING CONFUSION AND HATE

THERE IS EATING AND DRINKING TO
EXCESS OUT OF SHEER
BOREDOM AND ESCAPE
AND DIRE NEED FOR FOOD AND WATER
ALL OVER THE COUNTRY
AND THE WORLD

THERE ARE DISHES THAT NEVER GO AWAY
AND AN OVERLY CLUTTERED ATTIC AND BASEMENT
AND FAMILIES ACROSS THE NATION
LOSING THEIR HOMES ALTOGETHER TO
FORECLOSURE

BACK AND FORTH BETWEEN my REALITY
AND the REALITY
I CANNOT FEEL BALANCE
I CANNOT FEEL STRENGTH
IN MYSELF
AND SUBSEQUENTLY IN
THE WORLD AROUND ME

I HAVE LOST SIGHT OF THE BEAUTY
OF SIMPLY ENJOYING THAT WHICH IS
GRAND
IN
LIFE

I SUFFER SADLY FEELING
FULLY IMMOBILE
TO PARTICIPATE IN any REALITY

SIMPLY
SITTING
AND
STARING

AT STRIPES
AND SHADOWS

MAKING NO PLANS FOR A NEXT MOVE

UTTER SILENCE
WITHIN AND OUT

i FEEL STRETCHED TO THE POINT OF ACHING
i FEEL TIRED TO THE POINT OF TEARS
i FEEL ANXIOUS TO THE POINT OF WILTING

WHERE IS MY MIDDLE?
WHERE IS MY TRUTH?

BREATHE.
IN AND OUT.
OUT AND IN.

SURELY. I WILL FIND IT.

matrimony.

i am trying to find you
in the rage and the tears
and the silliness and the passion
you are all of this and more

i am trying to connect
the dots skipping odd
numbers in hopes to create
a new image


i am trying to love you
wholly
i am trying to
love me honestly
i am trying to fit a love
into a heart that has
become obese and confused

i am trying
and yet there is no try
there is do
and do not

for now, i will stick with
i do.

Be well.

On the radio the songs all sound the
same as they poetically slice
right to the core of the human
dilemma

love
fear
meaning

we juggle these things like
oranges or knives
well and not

it's all the same
we are all connected
by these things
that we cannot quite
manage
paralyzed by our
efforts to do it all
"right"

not knowing that
relativity holds the
reigns.

mostly we have to
go ahead and
Just Be.

and with that,
Be Well.

pushing out.

webdings.
remind her of wings, grounded
and she relates;
binding herself back with nagging
self doubt
financial worry
confusion about the "right" path

starting life anew
she crawls towards the baby steps
unsure if any of these risks are
altogether worth it and really
after all, being coddled is quite
pleasant.

her hunger begins slowly
and gnaws silently
and without notice
until the time when it is suddenly
not so soft, not soft at all.
nor is she.

she must swallow fear
stand up inside of herself
and walk right on out,
the world is awaits.

resolve

snowflakes fall animated like butterflies
until pavement requires they lay flat
much like the laughter that she chortles
only to land on her face in the form of crow's feet

her urges to makes change
within herself in order to change the world
bubble and quell, repeat, and thicken
the tendency to remain mindful cements her

the lists and daydreams and chats and searches
harvest a lot of hope for the future
yet yield few options for the behavior of the now
she will rally and sort, somehow

she is starting each moment
again and again
to see the potential power pooling
and propelling her morphing form forward

a snowflake that will land, sticky
and out of shape.