times are a changin...

tears spring from tight eyes
that share shock and hope, equally.
we have done this.
and after feeling so deeply SHAMEful of my country
for close to a decade, my heart swells.
pride.

this is the fabric of our people.
our character as a country is stitched with
diversity and therein lies its true strength.
we are remarkable.
suddenly, it seems we believe that.

it is the day after we elected barack obama.
we TRULY elected him.
a full laundry basket stares at me waiting for
me to tend to it. perhaps, another day.

today is HISTORYDAY.

i cannot pull myself away from the videos
the people in roxbury, chicago, wherever.
CRYING.
i CRY with them. here at my laptop.
the invisible thread that joins us all, as americans
is delicate and yet keeps us intwined, united.

i cry for the pain our country has endured
for too long.
for the promise that equality is REAL,
not just an ideal we pretend to applaud.
we did this? yes we did.

i cry for my children,
who can grow up in a country that
no longer makes me nauseous with horror.
i cannot stop crying today. and that is okay,
i think it's grief on a raw level.

i am mourning the loss of illusion.
we have reality now, we have to make it ours.

i will not stop this flow of emotion within myself
i admit it surprises me somewhat,
as i never realized how tightly guarded
i had grown over time. that's okay.


i exhale for the first time in a long while,
realizing only now how fierce
i was holding my breath.
for two long administrations.

change. social change.
is possible.
i do believe that.
it took one strong man, to remind me.

i am very proud.
let's do this.